just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
