How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
