Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
