Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
There r osticjed everywhere
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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