Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
this boner is exhausting
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Sober January is a disaster.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
