Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
