she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
