real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I hate all girls vehemently.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
