The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
