i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
