When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize