Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
