He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
