Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
