At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
