I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
