i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
