you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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