I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
