she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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