WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
