please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
