Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
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