You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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