lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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