I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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