who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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