Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
