who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
