Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
