this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize