Too much gin, very little bucket
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Randomize
