dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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