the new term for farting is butt boxing.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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