But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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