she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
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