I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
