I'm gonna have a badass scar
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
We left the knife in your bed.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
