the new term for farting is butt boxing.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
