i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
