it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize
