Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
