Capitaan dildo arrescate!
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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