Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
