Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize
