bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You may now shotgun with the bride
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
