Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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