I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Randomize
