just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I think my fart just growled at me.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
