Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
